Barbecue Lamb with Oktay

A tribute to my friend, Oktay Aksan...

In one of the many Christmas parties hosted by Virginia and Oktay in their Westdale home, Oktay and I got talking about barbecue lamb. I had suggested to Oktay that I missed the elaborate whole lamb barbecue that I enjoyed so much growing up in Africa.

I asked if he knew of any restaurants where I could treat myself to spicy grilled barbecue lamb. He thought for a moment. He knew of no place where I could find the kind of spicy open-fire barbecue lamb that I craved. Then with that famous twinkle in his eyes he added “…but there is no reason why we can’t do this ourselves.” Really?

Preparing whole lamb barbecue would be a complicated undertaking, I reasoned. Where would we find whole lamb or even a barbecue grill large enough to grill it? “Don’t worry about that” Oktay assured. We could buy whole lamb from a nearby farm and he assured me that a large enough grill could be found. I volunteered to supply the condiments and we planned the event for summer.

But summer came with life’s other events and we didn't get to have our barbecue lamb. At every Christmas party thereafter, we would renew our commitment to the elusive barbecue lamb. At our last Christmas party meeting, Oktay, though frail, was in high spirits. His enthusiasm for our barbecue lamb event hadn't waned and once again we agreed to finally get it done this summer. We never got to it.

Although our meetings were infrequent, each encounter was happy and memorable, filled with laughter and banter. I found much in Oktay to which I could relate. Stories about his Turkish childhood held a particular fascination. Once, during our conversation, he suddenly burst out singing the Scottish folksong, “My Bonnie is over the ocean……” It is a song of my own childhood and it instantly brought me pleasant memories. Oktay was a gentle and personable soul. He will be missed.

Barbecue Lamb with Oktay

4/16/2014 08:22:00 PM Tributes

Rwanda's Genocide: The Solider and the Survivor

My colleague, Dr. Eugene Nshimiyimana, tells the heart-wrenching story of how he survived the Rwandan genocide. A lesson in the destructiveness of hate and the redeeming power of peace.

Rwanda's Genocide: The Solider and the Survivor

4/08/2014 03:14:00 PM africa, history, war and peace

20 years since Rwanda genocide: Never Again

 

It's been 20 years since the genocide in Rwanda. The lesson for the world is a simple one. Never again. Here, my reflections on the genocide. 

CHCH TV News

Monday marks the 20th anniversary of one of the most violent chapters in human history. The Rwandan genocide saw more than one million people massacred. Carried out by Rwanda’s ethnic Hutu’s — they targeted the country’s minority Tutsi and moderate Hutu’s — using machetes, gasoline, guns and grenades.

Dignitaries from around the world attended a ceremony in Rwanda’s capital, Kigali. Actors performed a play based on the genocide. It had some in the audience were overcome with emotion — and needed to be carried away. Many watching lost their entire families in the genocide. For the United Nations, it was an opportunity to reflect on how the world responded two decades ago. Ban-Ki Moon is the U.N. Secretary General: “Many United Nations personnel and others showed remarkable bravery but we could have done much more, we should have done much more.”

The dark chapter in human history is horrific — but is one many say should not be hidden because it can be a lesson for the rest of the world. We caution you that some of the details and images in this next story are disturbing — and not suitable for all viewers. We spoke with two people at McMaster University Monday. One of them was directly impacted by the genocide.

Beatrice Kansayisa left Rwanda to go study in Cyprus, and just in time. Twenty years ago her parents, brothers, sisters and a neice were slaughtered by Hutu’s: “I lost everybody. I could’ve been killed. I’m lucky. I heard different stories but the majority died with machetes.”

She watched on television. The one hundred day long civil war that eventually killed about one million people in Rwanda. The world did nothing — countries who had the ability to intervene had nothing to gain. But McMaster University professor Bonny Ibhawoh says twenty years after the genocide, Rwanda has had to balance justice and reconciliation. “There wasn’t really an appetite for intervening in this obscure part of Africa. No strategic interest. Rwanda has no oil. The Rwandan government has had to tread that fine line between ensuring justice is done to the victims of the genocide but creating a free world that will move the nation forward that allows for reconciliation and healing.

20 years since Rwanda genocide: Never Again

4/08/2014 02:39:00 PM africa, history, war and peace